Every once in a while, I run across people who are baffled and frustrated by the behavior of certain talented friends of theirs. “They can write great stuff; why don’t they?” “Their fanfic is great; why don’t they try to submit stuff professionally?” “They’ve sold a bunch of books; why don’t they quit their day job and write full-time?”

In all of the cases I’m familiar with, the short answer to all of these questions is “Because they don’t want to.” That one isn’t interested in writing; his consuming passion is for his woodworking hobby, and no matter how many people tell him that he can write and should write and could sell that stuff he tosses off now and then, he’s just not interested. This one has no interest in making up her own characters; she wants to write about those characters, from that TV series, and nobody else, and there is no professional market for those stories, so fanfic is it for her, thanks anyway. The other one tried “being a full-time writer” ages ago and hated it, and likes having a day job and writing on the side, and sees no reason to disrupt a life that works perfectly well and pleasantly, just because lots of other people think that being a full-time writer is the be-all and end-all of desirable situations.

And then there are the folks who ask similar questions of published writers: “When are you going to write a real book?” (i.e., one that’s not genre, or not children’s, or not whatever one is currently writing) “Why are you writing media tie-ins, when you have such wonderful original characters and plots?” “Why don’t you do a novel/more short stories?” And a lot of the time, the answer is the same: the writer is happy writing what they’re writing, and doesn’t particularly want to do a “real book” or work in some other length or whatever.

What one person wants out of his/her writing, or out of your writing career, isn’t always what other people want out of theirs. It is worth providing encouragement if it seems appropriate — some folks really would like to write, or go professional, or quit their day jobs, and just need to have somebody believe in them. (I’d have stuck with my day job for several more years, at least, if it hadn’t been for my then-husband’s encouragement and support. And I’d have been miserable.) 

But sometimes people just aren’t ready yet to make the leap, whether it’s the leap to writing as a career or whether it’s the leap to writing at all. And some folks are happy right where they are. If you can’t tell the difference, you might want to try asking…and then believing people when they say they’re not interested right now. Or try it yourself and see what happens.

8 Comments
  1. I agree one hundred percent.

    I have the kind of personality that makes people think that I would be good at their profession. My HS biology teacher tried to talk me in to going in to biology. My music teacher thought I should go into the movie-recording industry like her (after more training, of course); my bro-in-law thought I should do physics like him; his office mate who was studying acoustics thought I would like acoustics; and my friend’s dad thought I would be good at Facilites Management. Which is his profession.

    It took me a very long time to choose. In the end, I picked to be a philosophy major, then go to grad school for teaching (which my parents encouraged– and yes, they’re teachers, or at least they’ve both taught a lot). I discovered that teaching, while incredibly enjoyable, isn’t something I want to stay in forever as my main profession. So I started getting a little more serious about my writing.

    I sometimes wonder if I wandered around looking for something that no one was telling me I “had” to do, so that I could feel like I chose it for myself. Which– would mean– that I HADN’T really chosen it. So I choose to believe that that mostly isn’t true.

    Encouragement and support is way different from pushing, though. Those same “teach-y” parents thought it was SO COOL that I wanted to be a philosophy major, and let me tell you, this isn’t a very common reaction. They also think the writing is great, as long as I keep teaching to support myself until the time may come that I don’t have to (and they are also perfectly willing to waste an evening, enthusiastically listening to me describe my latest plot developments). Not that it’s their business, per se, what my profession is. But the support is beyond wonderful.

    • S.A.Cox – People who are good at lots of different things have it especially rough when it comes to picking a profession, because there are so many things they could do…and so many of them are interesting! You are as lucky in your parents as I was in mine (which is pretty darned lucky, I think!).

  2. I have to agree 100% here. I am a writer, I love writing. Its my passion and I don’t think I could ever NOT write. Of course, when people learn this, they want to know why I don’t write books and ‘go proffessional’ and make it ‘worth while’ by getting paid for it.

    They never seem to understand that I don’t *WANT* to. I have no interest in entering the writing market, and don’t want my writing to ever feel like a job, or something I HAVE to do. I want to do it because I love it and if I want to get up and walk away from it for awhile – or put a story down because I can’t seem to follow it (to be returned to later) – then I like having the freedom to do that.

    People, in my life, anyway, don’t seem to get that just because you aren’t being paid for it doesn’t mean its not worth it. There are other things to be paid in.

    And the only benefits (apart from the money) that I can see, is that your work is protected by copyrights when its published. But I get around that by just letting a few people read what I write. (IE, I do not put my work online for just anyone to read or steal.)

    I’m not saying I would *never* be interested in ‘going proffessional’, but at this point in my life, I’m not. But people can’t seem to grasp that and leave me alone.

    So I fully agree with what you are saying here. So nice to hear other writers see it and understand. 🙂

    • Elentarian – Actually, your work is protected by the basic copyright law from the minute you finish it, and if you want more, you can register it yourself with the Library of Congress (assuming you are in the U.S.; other countries have different rules). Anyway, if you are in the U.S., http://www.copyright.gov/help/faq/ will take you to the Library of Congress FAQ page on copyright, which will tell you more about it than you probably want to know.

  3. If I had a penny for every time someone said to me “you’re a children’s librarian, you should write children’s books” I could pay off my student loans! It drives me BATS. Just because you deal with children’s books and children all day does not mean you’re a good writer! It’s a totally different thing! And I have no desire to add to the, ahem, less-than-stellar children’s books flooding the market and being dumped on my desk!

  4. Excellent points as always. I love writing, and I would love to be published, but not until I have a book finished that I can be proud of. My problem is that the people who love me keep saying `but this is terrific! Send it off!’ Very sweet of them, but how much do you trust your mother to assess the quality of your work? She thinks EVERYTHING I do is terrific. Even the stuff I wrote when I was sixteen and clueless.

  5. I don’t really understand what the definition of a writer is. I am sure it is not just someone who writes for a living. But if it is just someone who writes, a preschooler could be qualified for writing random nonsense letters! I have a vauge idea about it, but could anyone (I am sure most people know besides *me*) tell me the clear definition?

    • Mary-The dictionary definition is about as clear as you get: “someone who writes books; an author.” The trouble is, “author” is defined by the same dictionary as “the writer of a book.” So we don’t actually have a word in English that means, unambiguously, “a professional writer; someone who has written books and had them published.”

      So what we have are a whole bunch of people who mean “you ought to sell your work” when they say “you ought to be a writer.” But when you say to people (sometimes the same ones!) “I am a writer,” the next question they ask is “Have you had anything published?”